Tragedy

The world is broken. Whether it is Newtown, Boston, a personal crisis, or one of the various tragedies that plague our world, it is inevitable that we will have to face, and likely explain, a tragedy to someone who asks "why".

I was deeply moved by Newtown and I am still processing what that should mean for us as we look at issues like gun rights and personal safety.

This week, a couple that I am friends with, Gary and Lisa Black, were faced with the suicide of their 19 year old son Michael. As I saw the news begin to trickle out on social media, my heart sunk with sadness for the loss, for their heartbreak, for their family. How does one bury a child? Particularly an amazing young man like Michael Black.

They are at the front end of this journey and how it will impact their family but I am awestruck by a few things that I have seen in the first few days following this crisis of life and faith.

First, I will tell you that Gary and Lisa are people of faith. It is their faith that undergirds everything in their lives and I believe that it is critical to their ability to process this tragedy.

But, as I watched Gary this week from a distance, I saw a few things that I hope to be able to emulate one day if I face any type of tragedy.

In the face of tragedy, I think an honest expression of heartbreak is real and raw and is healthy to display. Gary has displayed this along with great leadership of his family. Gary is a great father. One need only spend a few minutes with the Black family to see how much love Gary has for Lisa and his children. His leadership clearly sets the tone for how his family will respond this crisis.

I have also been encouraged to watch as Gary has brought his close friends together to help mourn and celebrate Michael and his life. They have focused on what they love about Michael. I think it would be so tempting to isolate in a time of great personal tragedy but friendships are a key to helping us carry the heaviest burdens in our lives.

Gary, if you read this, know that I honor you and who you are as a man and leader. You have impacted many young men by the person you choose to be. Thank you for that and know that everything that made Michael the great young man he was was a result of you being his father.

I am hopeful for the Black family because I know that Gary and Lisa have their hearts, broken as they may be in this moment, in the right place. They understand that life is fragile and complex. They love people well and they lead well.

If you are facing a tragedy of your own, there may be nothing that will quench the anguish of the moment, but know that honesty, openness, vulnerability, faith, and friendships can carry you through.

Please continue to pray for the Black Tribe as they walk this difficult path.